my green winter coat

it was strangely cold this morning. it was my day off today and finally had time to start reading atlas shrugged by Ayn Rand. ive heard great things about this book, and in comparing it to her earlier novel - the fountainhead. and that was brilliantly written.  i also had lunch at my favourite cafe (batch) on Carlisle st - catching up with a friend. then i went to by some serious protein hair shampoo by matrix and a few fortifying treatments. my hair has been bleached beyond belief so i've decided i'm going to get a serious chop.. about 2 -3 inches as its just breaking all the time.. it kills me. i was thinking of dying it brown for the next few months and cutting it to a shorter blunt style like in this photo of Christine Centenera...

a really good friend of mine (the same one who got a build a bear) was and has been waiting the Alfred emergency room as she was in a lot of pain due to a complication that she has. it was too busy so she went to the Monash hospital instead, and they couldn't see her. its really heart breaking that our health system can't attend to most our patients. all this was happening whlist a friend of mine cooked dinner for me at her place - and it was delish! lamb culets with cous cous. i was feeling guilty i couldn't see her, but shes been put to sleep on pain killers and will hopefully be seen in the morning. now i'm in two minds about whether or not if i should watch australia lose to ghana tomorrow early morning. hmm xx

i'm also not feeling perfectly content right now and i feel like i have no one to talk to. two of my best friends aren't picking up their phones, another is in daylesford and one has just been to hospital. so i just found out that my boyfriend is having people over to watch the world cup, and he knows that i wanted to watch. he knew i've never had any secured plans. there was never an offer for me to come over and stay and then wake up for the game in the morning. i don't have any problems with his friends, but only with his family (who is from a different nationality and religion to mine). the problems reach so far that they disapprove of me and i'm not allowed into their household. so the whole time that we've been together i've never been accepted, and i've never been in the house whlist his parents are in the house. its really sad and it makes me uncomfortable as its a hard situation between the 2 of us. the only reason why they haven't interviened is because hes now going away for a while in about 10 days or so. 

i just feel so frustrated at the situation and i feel like he doesn't stick up for me, or doesn't even think to invite me as im always never been allowed over there. i understand hes respecting his parents wishes, but i understand that not all families are as loving or as accepting as most i know. i sent him a msg after the conversation saying thanks for not inviting me and that i really appreciate it. but instead he ignores it and hasn't done anything about it. i feel like not making plans to watch the soccer. i know that is immature, but anything to prove a point. but i guess in this case its hopeless. 

thank god no one reads this blog.
buenos noches xx